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Milly Taiden
Breathe…

For most of my life, I have been the kind of person who smiles at the world but deep inside there’s this big, gaping black hole controlling my emotions. Emptiness. Pain. The feeling of being so alone in the world that nothing ever makes you truly happy. Otherwise known as depression. Before I go into this subject, I want to state that this is my experience with depression.

National Network of Depression Centers (NNDC)

    Depressive illnesses are anything but rare in modern society. We all know someone who has struggled with depression.

  • FACT: By conservative estimates, one in five Americans has firsthand experience with depression, bipolar illness or another mood disorder
  • FACT: In a given year, roughly 21 million Americans, or about 9.5% of the U.S. population age 18 or older, are suffering from a mood disorder
  • FACT: About 11 in 100,000 people die yearly by suicide; mental illness is the number one predictive factor

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I want to start by saying that depression is an illness.

For so many years, I was told to ‘get over it’ or ‘what do you have to be sad about?’ so I held it in. I held in the struggle of waking up every morning and wanting it all to end.

To all those people who are told daily that they need to ‘snap out of it’, you have every right to feel how you feel. We cannot control depression. We can’t stop it from destroying a happy moment and making you feel like you are invisible. Worthless.

“The facts about depression, bipolar illness and related mood disorders speak for themselves. With proper diagnosis and intervention, all are highly treatable or manageable conditions. Yet these illnesses remain largely defined by the many areas where the best efforts of healthcare providers, researchers, academics, politicians, community leaders, patients and families are falling short. Too often, public perceptions of mental illness are ill-informed and sufferers are misunderstood and stigmatized. Gaps exist in the delivery and utilization of care, and under-diagnosis and misdiagnosis are common. These trends are exacerbated by a significant shortage of providers trained in evidence-based treatment practices.”

Please stop treating depression like it’s someone’s way of getting attention.

Unless you’re the one with thoughts of ending it all because you can’t stand the pain, you can’t stop the tears, your life feels meaningless, you might have a hard time understanding what it’s like. Depression doesn’t come with a sad look and obvious check list.

People have a hard time understanding what the depressed person can barely understand herself.

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Depression comes as a girl who couldn’t relate to anyone. A girl who could not understand why she couldn’t find pleasure or joy in anything she did.Depression comes as a teen who did amazing in school. A teen who was outgoing and fun and who liked to do things for others.

Depression comes as a woman who has a loving family but she can’t understand why there’s a void in her heart. A woman who is constantly surrounded by hugs, kisses and smiles but struggles to go on day by day.

It can hit you hardest when you are trying to do something with family or friends, leaving you feeling helpless. So you hide behind a smile and ask yourself why it keeps happening.

I used to sit by my bedroom window for hours. And just cry. I felt alone. I felt alienated. I had no one I could talk to and explain myself because most people didn’t get what I was feeling.

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My life as an author has put me outside of my home and in front of readers. It’s pushed me to interaction and real-time discussions with others. At first it was overwhelming. I am so grateful to readers for what they’d done for me. For my books. But I found myself withdrawing even more into the emptiness.

  • FACT: Up to 80% of those treated for depression show an improvement in their symptoms, usually within four to six weeks of beginning medication, psychotherapy, support groups or a combination of these approaches
  • FACT: Now that more and more primary care settings are acknowledging depression and discussing treatment options with patients, outcomes are beginning to improve

So I wrote. Books gave me an escape. They stopped the thoughts of ending the pain and instead allowed me to live in worlds I created. They allowed me to laugh. So you want to know why I chose romantic comedies? There you go. When you’ve lived with depression for most of your life, you need the laughter and the smiles of fun stories. Digging too deep into emotions you don’t understand can trigger things you might not be ready for.

There’s one reason why I chose to write this today.

I want to help.

To those who don’t suffer from depression but know someone who is:
Stop thinking this is just momentary.
Stop telling them to let it go.
Stop saying ‘you have nothing to be depressed about’.
Stop making them feel like they’re being selfish.
Nobody chooses to be depressed. Nobody chooses to live in the constant pain of feeling worthless. Nobody.
Listen.
Show some compassion.
Do something nice.
Remember that depression is an illness. A lot of people live with it and don’t share it with the world.

  • FACT: It is estimated that one third of those who seek help do not receive adequate treatment over the course of their lives

To those who live with this beast of dark emptiness:

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Don’t quit. Don’t give up on life.
Find an outlet.
Talk to someone. Speaking your feelings helps reduce the focus on it. It can be a therapist or a friend. Get someone you trust and tell them how you feel.
Do something you absolutely love.
See a doctor.
Don’t put a period in your life. Nobody but you is in control of getting you help.
Go outside. Get a hobby.
Remember that you aren’t alone. That feeling telling you that you are, is wrong. Someone out there loves you. Needs you. Would be broken without you.
More than anything…

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Just breathe.
Keep fighting.
One step at a time we can go real far.

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Need help? Know someone who does?
1 (800) 273-8255
National Suicide Prevention Lifeline
Website: www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org

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New York

This past weekend I went to Sexy in the City (here in NY)

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It was great! I saw some amazing author friends like Kym Grosso, Deborah Bladon, Jill Prand, Laura Kaye and Carly Phillips!

From left to right: Laura Kaye, Carly Philipps and me

From left to right: Laura Kaye, Carly Philipps and me

Deborah Bladon and me

Deborah Bladon and me

Kym Grosso and me

Kym Grosso and me

Jill Prand and me

Jill Prand and me

I even gaveaway a ‘DIRTY’ basket hehehe you know, you know. The photo is with me and the winner.

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Below is my niece and how Milly-fied she was. 100% Promoting me. She’s too cute.

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My lovely sister and niece went with me as assistants. Somehow had to put all that swag on the table LOL!

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Next con is Ohio this week. Be sure to stay tuned for awesome photos of that one!

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Ottawa

You want more info on what I’m up to? Awesome!

Also in April, because one con, full time writing and trying to have family isn’t enough work, I went to Romancing the Capital Ottawa. This was a great fun with friends and readers. We had a small convention and lots of laughs. We even celebrated my Birthday it was fun had by all.

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We had a Find Alice in Wonderland Party.

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A 50’s dress up Howling Ball.

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And amazing authors and readers dress up with us.

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I hope next year to see more of my Amazing Readers join us for Romancing the Capital Ottawa 2016.

Have you caught up on my latest series
Furocious Lust Shorts Book 1-5?

I am working on book 6 to finish as we speak.

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Hope you all enjoyed them to this point.​

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Vegas

Hey you lovely readers!!!

Sorry I have been so busy lately tons of conventions back to back. So thought we would look back at the last few conventions in hopes that some of you will be able to meet me at some in the future.

I started the book convention in Vegas Baby!!!

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It was a amazing trip where I got to meet some of my great Sexy Bites street team members and some of you my wonderful readers. I hope next year to see more of you in attendance and would love you to let me know if your are going so I can keep it in mind to find you!!

Hope you are all caught up in my new releases.
I am working hard between conventions to get them out.

Furocious Lust Shorts 1-5

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Cover Reveal for Red Hot Lovers Steamy Romance Boxed Set

RHL Banner

Red Hot Lovers: 18 Novels of Love, Passion, and Thrilling Suspense.
RELEASE DATE: March 24, 2015

ON SALE FOR A LIMITED TIME! Over 3000 pages from your favorite NYT and USA Today bestselling authors!

Eighteen NYT, USA Today, and top-selling authors have banded together to bring you 18 beautifully romantic, heart-pounding stories of love, passion, and thrilling suspense.

These 18 sexy, sweet men will go to the ends of the Earth to win their ladies’ hearts, but will these lovers emerge unbroken?

From first kisses to dangerous encounters and second chances at love, we’ve gathered all 18 wonderful stories in one big box. This heart-pounding collection is filled with confident, sexy, and sweet men you’ll fall madly in love with.

Red Hot Lovers

EIGHTEEN NOVELS TO CAPTURE YOUR HEART
AND SET YOUR BLOOD ON FIRE!

“Their Second Chance” by Milly Taiden
Nick lost the woman he loved to the heartbreak of infertility. One locked door will either leave them broken forever or back together.

Read the rest of this entry »

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